What Do You Gain from Being the Person Who Can't?

I’ll be damned if you don’t struggle with Resistance like I do (and I’d like to know how you do it). I’m talking about the Resistance that talks negative in your head, and tells you it’s not worth trying because it’ll be too much work, it won’t lead to anything, others will laugh or judge you. I’m talking about the Resistance that keeps you from attaining your goals, making your dreams come true, and cultivating santosha right here and now.

In I don’t want to, I don’t feel like it, Cheri Huber and Ashwini Narayanan tackle this unhelpful and contradictory trait of human beings. Deep down, most of us know what we want and need that will support our wellbeing and happiness, yet we constantly allow ourselves to be sidetracked. We genuinely believe that we can’t, that it’s impossible to find contentment and happiness given the current conditions. Some day, some day…

Resistance disguises itself in many forms. For me, it’s the distraction from writing, like Facebook or just another phone call, it’s the urgent need to pee that lifts me off my meditation cushion, it’s fear of failure, it’s the million chores that seem more important than exercising or cooking a healthy meal, it’s saying yes even when I meant no. Resistance will keep you from focusing on what is really important, it will taunt you with an easy solution.
Whatever your goals, dreams or needs, there is only one person who can make it happen. And that person cannot be the one that allows Resistance to take over.
“Look to see what you get as a result of remaining the person who can’t. There is a payoff for everything we do and don’t do. What is the payoff for continuing to be a person who can’t?”
The authors nailed it straight with this question. How is it that you benefit from your Resistance? Is it protection? Are you avoiding confrontation? Is it easier to continue with the daily mindless grind, than to stop and think, and do it differently? That question, in and of itself, has helped me overcome some manifestations of my Resistance, and I hope it can help you too.

About I don’t want to, I don’t feel like it: How Resistance Controls Your Life and What to Do About It by Cheri Huber and Ashwini Narayanan
This book is the latest in a series by Cheri Huber. I loved reading it. The chapters are brief and simple. There is no esoteric nonsense about the approach, which is grounded in buddhist zen teachings. It offers simple strategies and questions to get to the root of resistance and to stop sabotaging your own efforts.
This book was a gift from the inspirational Anna, who dares to be authentic and follows her dharma, even if it’s not the easiest way. So so grateful our paths met.